Graduation: the epitome of ambivalence

Wow, this is so embarrassing. Remember when I announced the debut of this blog last summer and then I only made one post? Yikes, I’m the worst. Anyway, here we are now, almost a year later, and I’m finally getting around to my second post! Let’s not dwell on my laziness and instead rejoice in the fact that I’m finally blogging again..it’s the little things in life. The reason I haven’t gotten around to another post until now (bear with me, I know the excuse I’m about to give is pretty lame) is because I was busy living the highs and lows of my senior year at IU. I couldn’t be distracted by such things as typing down my thoughts..although I will admit I did find the time to squeeze in an embarrassing amount of Netflix. The inspiration and motivation to finally hit the ground running (or hit the keyboard running if you will..you missed my puns didn’t you?) came from the momentous occasion of my graduation. Granted, it’s been over a month now, but hey I needed some time to develop my thoughts about post-grad life before diving right in.

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Doing big things because of these supportive people

So, isn’t “ambivalence” such a great word? And wow, just so fitting in this instance. Graduation is weird. It stirs up a lot of competing emotions. I’m nostalgic and hopeful and melancholy and excited and relieved and anxious. Okay, sorry, I’m done flaunting my wide range of knowledge regarding emotions. The point is, a lot of things have been happening and will be happening in the near future that give me a “whoa” feeling. (I’m attempting to balance out my earlier vocabulary word vomit with a simple “whoa”..you’re welcome).

To catch everyone up, I’m in a bit of a limbo. I’m living in Bloomington for the summer (shout out to that chill Bloomington summer vibe) and working two jobs for the time being. The first job..drum roll please..is a Housing Assistant position with RPS. Yes, you heard that right, RPS. No, I simply cannot escape employment with good old Residential Programs & Services. But hey, at least I changed positions, right? For this job I get to sit at the center desk of Briscoe dormitory and answer any and all questions lil summer camp attendees may have. I also get to answer the phone and ease the minds of incoming freshmen’s worried parents. Lastly, I get to give tours of Briscoe for which there’s a script we’re expected to follow. One of the items on this script is introducing yourself, which includes telling the audience your year at IU. That part’s especially fun. All in all, the gig’s not too shabby.

So, what’s my second job you ask? I’m an “Advertising Coordinator”, which is really just a fancy way of saying I’m a saleswoman. I give pitches to local businesses to take out ad space with the company I work for. Envisioning me in a sales role may give some of you a giggle, but I implore you to take that giggle back because I’m actually not half bad. I just try to suppress my awkward tendencies to the best of my ability and let my natural charm do the talking. This one’s fun because I get to meet a plethora of different people, which basically just brings people-watching to a whole new level. Also, more importantly, it’s actually taught me a lot about Bloomington. For example, were my fellow IU students even aware that Bloomington has not one but TWO roundabouts sprinkled throughout the town?! It also just dawned on me that I  said “fellow” students..I guess I can’t say that kind of thing anymore because I’m old and irrelevant. Anyhow, I get to talk to people and see an entirely different side to Bloomington, so being an “Advertising Coordinator” isn’t half bad.

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Look!!! Both roundabouts in one screenshot — simply amazing!

Finally, we’re approaching the most important and anticipated section of the post. I call it “Thailand”. The reason I’m currently in limbo is because I’m biding my time until October, which is when I embark on my journey to Thailand. I’m well aware of how cheesy that “embarking on my journey” thing sounded, but I don’t care because it’s THAILAND. I’ll be going through Greenheart Travel’s Teach English Abroad program for a semester and returning in March. So, I’ll take my bow now for finding such an epic way to postpone the joys of full-on adulthood such as a 9-5 office job, 401(k) plans, and insurance premiums. Frankly, I’m proud of myself for even knowing what the real world entails..that’s the first step to adulthood, right? Anyway, here I find myself feeling ambivalent again — nervous for my arrival to Thailand yet excited for the adventure, terrified for my future responsibilities in America come March, yet eager to embrace the challenge and satisfaction of being truly independent. And more great news — living abroad means a revival of my travel blog, YEEEEE. So, here’s to graduation and all the goodbyes I’ve had to say to make way for all these exciting new opportunities.

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